Merry Christmas, and Happy New Year from Josh and Jen!

Merry Christmas, and Happy New Year from Josh and Jen!

And now for the update that I have put off writing for over two months…

It breaks my heart to say our adoption journey for Kolja, Vitja, and Kristo is (for the most part) over. The Supreme Court failed to consider our petition, and the International Adoptions Committee in Estonia met for a second time with the new Head of the Committee and yet again, only approved an adoption for one child, not three.

Two things are still left hanging in the air:

Our Estonian lawyer refuses to settle for what is happening here. We are exhausted in this fight, but she was willing to file a petition for us (for free) at the European Court of Human Rights. These are only filed in extreme circumstances, and are mainly for emotional value, if won, which they rarely are. However, we may not hear anything for a few years. This is the highest court in Europe, I believe.

The main evening paper in Tallinn, Estonia asked to write a huge article on us. We are the first Americans to have challenged a decision like this, and been denied, They wanted to know our thoughts about the process. We figured we had nothing to lose, and our article was published in November over there. A link to the article can be found, here, but it’s not translated. Some of the comments can explain the view most people have of Americans. http://www.ohtuleht.ee/500958/kommentaarid#comments

I firmly believe that God can use anything for His bigger plan. I hope all of this was in some way a path that brought Him glory.

Right now, it doesn’t appear that He is planning to turn things the way we thought He would. So what’s next?

It may seem like we’ve spent a fortune on a venture that has led us nowhere, and I want to clear that misconception. We still have about $30K saved up. Most of the money was not going to be needed until the adoption became final, which is good. Our main problem, is what does God intend for us to use it on?

We’ve got many ideas brewing in our heads: Do we become missionaries? Do we use it to help Life is Hope finish their orphanage in Haiti? Do we start another international adoption? Do I use it to stay home for a year after we’ve adopted?

We’ll figure it out. We spent a few months, just merely sitting still and trying to ask God what He wants next. When suddenly something fell into our laps...

We’ve been given the opportunity to provide a home (and hopefully a permanent one) for a sibling group of FOUR from West Virginia. There are two younger and two preteen siblings, but we believe God has given us the tools and support we need to make this a permanent placement. We’ve met the children several times, and really connect with them. In fact, we got to ring in the New Year celebrating with them and our new friends, their current foster parents and families. A part of me is so worried to let my heart go again, because I know too many adoption horror stories, and I was in one. But we can’t let our devastation keep us from moving forward. 

We’ve had such an emotionally exciting year. Although very little has happened in the way we desired for ourselves, we did both get to travel to a new country together. Josh ran his first marathon in honor of our nephew, Rowan, and I got to have another life-changing experience in Haiti visiting people who are near and dear to my heart.

Thank you to everyone who has held my hand, wrote letters, cried, and prayed with us through this process. We hope you will still continue to be there for us, as we will surely need you if we become an instant family of six! Thank you for sacrificing your money to help us when we saw no way of monetarily reaching our goal. I assure you it will go to a worthy cause, and will also help us afford mental and physical therapy for our future children as they heal and cope. 

Nothing will ever replace the pain of this loss, nor will we forget it, but we know we are getting closer to being where God intends for us to be.

Thank you for believing in us as we pursued such a bold goal. Through you, I know what it means to be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God’s love. (Ephesians 3:19). Stay tuned for what’s next, and remember that “God is not about fruitfulness, He is about faithfulness.” 

photo credits: Caitlin Prusha Moore Photography http://caitlinmoorephotography.net/