When I envision our boys, I picture them sitting on our laps. I'm looking into their smiling eyes, and reading them stories. I’m picking up the pillows they’ve knocked over as they run through the house ransacking the living room while pretending to be pirates. We’re bandaging up scrapes and bruises. Josh is playing ball with them in the backyard (while I either cheer them on, or pretend to have some sort of athletic skill). Call me sappy, but these are the fluttering images I get that help me keep struggling through the paper chase and waiting. Those are our dreams. I am sure those moments will be found, but after our classes and discussions with other first-hand parents, we know these moments will most likely be found in clouds of struggle. We have been preparing our hearts for things we know we can’t be prepared for.
God didn’t create life for people to sit back a watch the hard cases suffer. There is love to be found in every battle. And one such battle involves my loving and incredible aunt and uncle, and their two daughters. I am sure that without their presence, I would not be who I am today. I would not have the faith I have right now. Twice in my life they took me in when I needed a place to stay. They put up with my stubbornness as a moody teenager and helped me deal with the pain of being away from my mom when they didn’t darn well have to. They gave me my own room, fed me, drove me to school out-of-district, and made me feel like I belonged. My uncle talked my ear off about history, and our crazy world. They both taught me how to have integrity, how to see things for what they are and what they aren’t. Aside from helping me, they have also been a rock in the lives of several other people, who needed someone during their adolescent years.
A few years ago, Aunt Janice and Uncle Bob decided they finally wanted to become foster parents. Most people in their 50’s save up for a vacation home, buy a boat, a nice car, etc. God had other plans for them. They decided to welcome B (for privacy and safety, I am leaving her name out) into their family, a neglected 5-year old, who would completely alter their lives. B proved to be the most difficult case my aunt ever endured, after 20 years of teaching and working with young children. It broke my heart to see her exasperated, and at wits end. At one point I can even say they were both completely withdrawn from her. She has exhausted them to the end of their ropes. But they didn’t give up.
One year later, B was a changed girl. After giving her a year-and-a-half of consistency, she had the love, care, and attention she always needed to progress socially, emotionally, and academically. She even got a new baby sister. Yes, my aunt and uncle unexpectedly learned B had a newborn sister, and welcomed her as well. In July, both girls were finally able to call my aunt and uncle MOM and DAD. They are now officially adopted, and according to my aunt, she and Unlce Bob are tired, but have never felt more full of life and love in their entire lives. It’s a happy ending, but not without struggle. B’s behavior issues still exist, although they are no where near as difficult as before. Her baby sister has a heart murmur, and they are investigating the possibility of surgery. Both girls will continue to face medical and emotional challenges, but these are challenges they will all face head-on as a family, with full faith in God to get them through, as he always has. And who knows? More surprises may be up ahead.
I love you, Aunt Janice and Uncle Bob. You inspire me in so many ways, just as you always have. Thank you for never giving up on me and supporting me through the years. I know you will continue to do so when I need your help and encouragement with our future boys! Welcome to the family, girls! You bring so much life into our family. We love you.
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